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Friday
Aug292014

#107 - The Rage of Entitlement.

This week on Something Wonky, Travelling Tony’s life is a treat, finally we have a Cost Benefit Analysis for the not an NBN and Chris Pyne is still trying to ruin Higher Education.

Australia continues its fight against humanity, News Limited dominates Stop The Press and we have a surprising announcement for Man of the Year

THE FOCUS GROUP

Travelling Tony’s visit to Peter Mac helps him pay for a “private function”

Well what’s your plan to pay for Tony and Joe’s tax cuts for rich people?

They’re not “gaffes” - they’re unintended revelations of the government MPs’ personal privilege and lack of understanding of the rest of us

The government has released a “Cost Benefit Analysis” of their NBN plans, done by a hand picked panel, and amazingly it supports them.

Speaking of people who can’t internet, George Brandis’s secret data retention discussion paper has been leaked

Christopher Pyne is facing resistance to his plans to ruin the Tertiary Education sector

Freedumb

Victorian election

Things are looking rough for Dennis Napthine and the Liberal Party

Last drinks.

AUSTRALIA VS HUMANITY

Morrison asked at inquiry why the time we’re holding asylum seekers in detention has increased threefold

“Why do you believe that stopping the boats and stopping the drownings can be achieved by detaining children in these ways,” Triggs asked. “Frankly Madam President, the results speak for themselves,” Morrison replied. Triggs appeared unsatisfied with the response. “How can you justify the indefinite detention of children in these conditions for more than a year when there is not evidence this is the policy that is stopping the boats?” she asked…

Then

Morrison said he could not move them onshore as doing so would be fulfilling the promises made by people smugglers. “I understand they would like to come to the mainland and not be part of the offshore processing policy,” he said, but noted that “they paid people smugglers to get to Australia”

Scott Morrison’s treatment of Gillian Triggs is endemic of the government’s wider problem with women

Asylum seekers suing Scott Morrison over Christmas Island detention

What toll are we imposing on the people who enforce our brutal anti-refugee policies?

To rub salt into the wounds, Tony’s wife Margie has been named patron of KidsXpress, an organisation that “aims to provide childhood trauma victims with ways to cope with their feelings and experiences”

STOP THE PRESS

Press Council Chair Julian Disney is bullied into standing aside when News Ltd’s behaviour is under review

Former News CEO Kim Williams spills the beans on his old comrades.

Man of the Year…. Allegedly

Kevin Andrews is the Natural Family Man of the Year according to some whack jobs.

Download "The Rage of Entitlements"

Thursday
Aug212014

#106 - Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word.

This week on Something Wonky, there’s no business like Joe Business, Tony can’t stop talking about unity, we still don’t have a budget, but we do have a list of stupid things that our federal government has been doing in the mean time. Is there a changing wind in Australia versus Humanity, or just a new stench blowing in from a different angle? And in Stop The Press we have a newspaper suing a competitor because they reported news.

There’s no business like Joe Business

Nobody will stand up for Joe. Abbott distances himself - “well, plainly, I wouldn’t say that”. Pyne refuses six times to support his colleague. Instead, they try some idiotic lies. Abbott tries the line “whatever people may think about the way Joe expressed himself in a particular radio interview, he has a plan to ensure that all Australians are better off in the long-term. It’s the only plan that is currently before the Australian people.” And Pyne comes out with “The simple fact is that this is the guy who has driven the abolition of the carbon tax, the cost of which fell heaviest on low-income households”, winning a special award for the least accurate use of the phrase “the simple fact is” in recent Australian political history.

THE FOCUS GROUP

Tony Abbott can’t stop talking about unity

We still don’t have a budget

This week in stupidity.

AUSTRALIA VS HUMANITY

STOP THE PRESS

News Corp’s Clive Palmer obsession

News Corp chief defends cash-strapped Australian, saying it is much loved

News Corp sends in the lawyers as its CEO tells his staff there’s nothing to see here

Crikey owner Private Media and News Corp reach legal agreement

The Bolt report isn’t getting any saner

Download "Sorry seems to be the hardest word"

Friday
Aug152014

#105 - Let Them Drive Cake

SomethingWonky explores a tough week for the government, as their friends turn on them

THE FOCUS GROUP

  1. Liberals Are Doing It To Themselves
  2. Backdowns
  3. Things you’d think should be backdowns, but aren’t yet

AUSTRALIA VS HUMANITY

  1. More revelations regarding children on Nauru: Save The Children lists “systemic violation” of children’s rights (DISTURBING LIST ON LINK - INCLUDING CASE STUDIES)
  2. 190 Experts Issue Collective Statement Accusing Australia of ‘Inhumane’ Treatment of Asylum Seekers

STOP THE PRESS

  1. The far right tries something completely insane with s18C: suing Mike Carlton for racial vilification, which will totally not demonstrate that fair comment is different from bullshit inaccuracies like the column Bolt (who is cheering this prosecution on) got in trouble for.
  2. After The Australian’s “fuckoffgate” campaign of last week against Mike Carlton, it was kind of weird for Noel Pearson, long-standing columnist for The Oz, at that Garma festival where if you recall from last week an ALP MP was “prejudiced” against The Australian, to publicly and repeatedly this week tell a cabinet minister to “fuck off”
  3. DT resident toddler Tim Blair launches campaign against Carlton’s replacement John Birmingham for swearing - as if there aren’t emails out there of Blair telling readers to “fuck off”.
  4. Chris Kenny rants in The Australian about Twitter being one-sided
  5. Fairfax, still cutting staff, pays four executives an additional $2.4m

Download "Let them drive cake"

Friday
Aug082014

#104 - Just Stop Talking

This week on SomethingWonky, we track where you’ve been on the internet, demand you explain where you’ve been overseas, and disappoint Andrew Bolt. But we phone him first because we wouldn’t want him to think we’re not mates.

THE FOCUS GROUP

  1. Govt cancelling a stupid vandal decision

  2. Stupid Vandal Decisions

  3. Australians overseas

  4. Let them eat Brioche

  5. Dumb comment central

AUSTRALIA VS HUMANITY

  1. Chief immigration psychiatrist, Dr Peter Young, whose voice we heard last week, explains that Australia is deliberately inflicting harm on vulnerable people, creating “an environment that is inherently toxic and has characteristics which over time reliably cause harm to people’s mental health”. He says the system is deliberately harsh, breaks people’s health, costs a fortune, compromises the ethics of doctors and is intended to place asylum seekers under “strong coercive pressure” to abandon plans to live in Australia. “Suffering is the way that is achieved.” Scott Morrison asks us to wait for more evidence
  2. Scott Morrison pretends that the Sri Lankan asylum seekers have given something up by not going back to India; Indian High Commisison points out that they never agreed to accept non-citizen Tamil asylum seekesr anyway
  3. UN slams Sri Lanka over its treatment of asylum seekers, deporting Afghan and Pakistani refugees without processing their applications.
  4. Scott Morrison’s $330,000 media briefing room (with $800 doorknob) has never been used.
  5. Gay asylum seeker here for AIDS conference terrified of going back to his country after they looted his shop, bashed him, and threatened to throw acid at him. Still not enough to hvae any confidence we’d help him.
  6. National Council of Churches points out that offshore detention costs $3,744 per person per day while a Letitia McQuade argues that there’s an even more crippling cost - to our humanity. And others are applying pressure on christians to speak up against deliberately harming children for any reason
  7. Law Report story on treatment of refugees in Indonesia explores our cunning scheme to totally break refugees before they come here.
  8. New challenge: how long can you defend the Abbott govt approach to refugees without saying something racist?

STOP THE PRESS

  1. A cowering Fairfax pressures Mike Carlton to resign for calling some critics in personal correspondence “bigots” and, worst of all, “Likudists”. Idiots like The Oz and Blot publish a list of these responses, but without the original no-doubt inoffensive contributions to which he was responding (“I’ve been called a bag of Nazi slime, a Jew-hating racist”). Blot calls him a “wuss” for resigning, because he doesn’t have the courage to sulk for a few days before slinking back.
  2. A Tale of Two Cartoons. Fairfax publishes a cartoon showing an old Israeli man (shown with big nose and cap) pressing a button on his remote control to make Gaza explode. Australian Jewish News demands a boycot. SMH backs down and apologises for the big nose thing. Meanwhile the Oz, which has enthusiastically decried its competitor, publishes a nasty cartoon by the increasingly deranged Bill Leak suggesting murdered Palestinian children are a deliberate PR stunt by Hamas.
  3. The Age covers HRC President Gillian Triggs as if it’s the 1960s.
  4. Librarian who allegedly leaked details of corrupt scholarship for PM’s daughter charged by police. The Oz desperately hopes New Matilda gets punished for the journalism it’s too corrupt to do. Also Oz even unable to do proper journalism when preparing their attack on proper journalists. (Chris Graham points out how absurd their going after Wendy Bacon is). New Matilda calls bullshit in their claims, Oz just excited to be talking about itself again. Blot calls hypocrite first, suggesting it’s the same as hacking the phones of murdered schoolgirls.
  5. Criticising The Australian is really criticising indigenous people
  6. Daily Teleraph mystifyingly recovers trust of its readers, so now it’s just distrusted by one in two of them, the least trusted media outlet in the country. Begging the question: what do Daily Telegraph employees tell their children they do for a living to hide the shame? Parking inspector? Puppy strangler?

Download "Just Stop Talking"

Friday
Aug012014

#103 - Jeremy's Twitter feed

This week Something Wonky wonders if there is anywhere Australia won’t go when it comes to anti-asylum seeker cruelty. We revisit the exciting new regime for job seekers and pretend to have read Joe Hockey’s Biography.

AUSTRALIA VS HUMANITY

  1. On the eve of the National Inquiry into children in immigration detention Scott Morrison launches a broadside into the Human Rights Commission president Gilliant Triggs
  2. Then the next day the Inquiry hears evidence that the Department told the health service provider to “withdraw” figures regarding the significant health problems.
  3. Meanwhile they heard evidence of abuses against the children - including creepy sexual advances of staff towards captive children.
  4. Just moments before the High Court would have had to make a decision about the refoulement of the 157 Sri Lankans we were keeping cruelly in the middle of the ocean… suddenly the government decides to process them on Australian soil. Seems humiliating, and dodgy - resentfully copping a backdown in order to avoid the court setting a precedent against your conduct. Fortunately the Oz was able to make it sound much nicer - a “deal” he’s “negotiated” with India.
  5. Government blocks Senator Hanson-Young from visiting the Tamil asylum seekers at Curtin “based on the interests of the good management and safety of the centre”.
  6. Australia redefining refugees’ birthdays so it can treat them as adults.

THE FOCUS GROUP

  1. Time for the SomethingWonky Job Applicator 2014 (TM)
  2. People Being Mean To Joe
  3. More assaults on the vulnerable
  4. More stupid decisions by the vandals in power
  5. What is Tony doing?
  6. Trials of the Left

STOP THE PRESS

  1. The Daily Telegraph on Sunday celebrates assaults in NSW prisons.
  2. Press Council’s new rules demand that reasonable steps are taken to ensure factual material is accurate and not misleading even elsewhere than actual reports. Uh oh, says News Corp.
  3. Oz Editorial Corner

Download "Jeremy's Twitter feed"